how we communicate.
Ben is trying to tell a story about his new girlfriend, but Marcie has just informed us that whomever wants to talk must raise their hand in the air and then wave it while they’re speaking. Like a puppet, but with waving instead of talking. Ben keeps raising his hand and asks if he can talk.
“No,” Marcie says. “Papa talk.”
With his arm raised and his hand waving, Evan says, “I’d like to hear what Ben has to say.”
Ben finally gets to talk and Marcie corrects his voice—tells him in a squeaky voice “it needs to be like this.”
Ben, with his arm straight up and his hand waving, squeaks out, “I brought my girlfriend home to meet my family and—to my girlfriend—my brother’s wife said, ‘Ben sure does bring home a lot of girlfriends.’”
We laugh so hard. Evan raises his hand and Marcie calls on him. Evan squeaks his voice, but he’s also now talking like a squeaky robot? “I’m sorry, Ben. That. Is. Shit-ty.”
At Costco, I wait in line for the samples of maple Spam on a Hawaiian role. They are nowhere close to being ready, but a group of about seven of us aren’t going anywhere. I can’t help but notice a man and his wife with a cart in front of me. The man is manning the cart. He’s left his cracked iPhone open in the seat of the cart. It’s open to a group text with four or five people included. I can only see two text messages. One from the man (all in broken text line structure and format) and another one from someone named “Helen.”
from his bubble (green):
Use your
have credit card if that one doesn’t have enough
money you try the other oneHelen:
Liv, stop this destructive behavior
I kept waiting for another message. I wanted to see if anyone came to Liv’s defense. Or if Helen was right. Maybe this man’s name was Liv or he had Liv’s phone and suggesting using a credit card was destructive behavior. I never found out. My Spam sandwich arrived and it was delicious. Not delicious enough to be a person who purchases Spam, but worth the wait.
“We should start waking up early again and watch the Winning the Toddler Stage classes,” Evan says. He’s a smart man, so I know that he has let some time pass since I have made the parenting faux pax that spurred this comment. Enough time so that it’s not obvious what I’ve done wrong. I think back to our morning with Marcelline and tick off on my hands a few interactions that could be in the running, but nothing’s an out-right winner.
“Yeah, we should.”
A radio job with a special communication qualification:
On a stray Tuesday, I get a friend request from my sister on Facebook. We haven’t spoken directly since May. I scroll through her updates and “like” a few posts about her daughters and feel better about it all, because now I know a bit of what’s going on with her.
I come home from an event and feel like I can’t communicate with friends as enthusiastically as I used to. I’m wondering if I should cut back on my antidepressants by a small fraction. I’ve been running a ton and am 40 days sober (like Jesus… but he had to go to the desert with none of his friends to do it), so my depression has been a lot better. Maybe I could swing it?
I see two women in their 20s outside the window of my desk. I should be writing, but instead I’m watching them. They are standing by a car and it looks like they’re fighting. Something happened and now they are arms-crossed, taking turns talking, sometimes gesturing passionately. I watch them for more than three full minutes. I know this because I record them with my phone… just in case something fiery happens and I need/want to share it with my group text. Nothing of note happens.
Evan is on his way out the door to go to an Urgent Care appointment. He gets an automated phone call that tells him the hospital is on lockdown, because of an active shooter. He decides not to go. He’d rather deal with a headache than a gunshot wound.
“Did you get that call because of your appointment?”
“No, I got that call because I’m a nurse at Swedish.”
Almost every day, I send my friend Evie what the app Co—Star says about her horoscope.
Marcelline and I got to go to my favorite ramen place. On my right sat two guys on their first date. They were bears… am I allowed to say that? One guy said he wanted to ask a question, but… and then motioned his eyes towards Marcie.
“That’s not our responsibility. We don’t have to protect her.”
I mean, I guess I agree? So I made forced conversation with my toddler as these men talked about their sexual kinks. I tried to channel all of my multitasking skills to talk and listen at the same time, but it hardly worked. They had to know that I could hear them so clearly. At one point, I sneezed and in a voice not raised at all, one of the men said, “Bless you.”
“Thank you,” I said softly.
“You’re welcome.”
this is how we communicate.
A Little Woo:
SCOR-PI-OOOOOOOOOOO (said like “Rufio” from Hook): Your time has finally arrived, Scorpios. Explore the darkness a little bit during this time. What’s lurking there that you love, but have been afraid to explore?
These words for Taurus (me) makes me want to cry (happy tears):
If you’ve been meaning to launch a passion project before the end of the year, this week you may forge a connection with the ideal comrade who will help you see things through. Show gratitude for people who have supported you throughout the years, and be sure to pour into them too.
Quick Hits:
Jam of the Week: Sampha – Spirit 2.0.
(this song is a few months old, but it is hitting these days.)
Just A Ghost & Her Baguette.
(this kind of work makes me so happy.)I Loved This Movie & Recommend It To No One.
(this movie is ab-so-lutely fucked up. I cannot stop stop thinking about how some day—some horrible day—Nathan Lane will pass away and there will be a memorial reel that they play at each and every awards show, because he is a goddamn legend. and there will be a producer of that reel who asks her assistant, “do you think we should include the clip of Nathan Lane spitting Boar’s Head ham into the mouth of a demon-baby-puppet?”)Cannot Wait For This Movie.
(I have always been a huge fan of dream interpretation… now add A24 craziness… and Nicholas Cage.)Still Looking For Halloween Inspiration?
(love.)100% Me As A Parent.
(I actually feel pretty bad about it… gotta start taking those parenting classes with Ev again.)
I’m so happy you’re here.
xxo,
rachel.