putting myself out there.

and loving it.

I’ve never been described as “shy.” Evan likes to call me “Overshare Stevens” and I can’t exactly disagree. More often than not, I find myself having two drinks at a party and then telling a stranger about things you’re really only supposed to tell your doctor. Shockingly, I don’t make many friends at parties.

But I am a storyteller. I am a writer. I like sharing personal essays and honing my craft. I am an essayist who writes about my messy-ass life. (just in case you didn’t catch the title of this Substack.) In this filtered world, I am getting less and less afraid to show the ugly truths of my life. (see the last two slides.)

So as a storyteller and as an over-sharer and as someone who is constantly trying to push herself and make her craft sharper, I started going to Moth StorySLAMS in Seattle. I love them. I’ve always loved listening to The Moth Radio Hour, but there is something particularly special about being with a room full of people from your community and hearing stories. And it’s exhilarating to actually tell a story. I’ve told a couple now. Stood in front of a live audience and bared my soul. And I felt like I wanted to throw up a bit. I even have that shaky feeling now, knowing that I’m sharing one here. But for today’s Messayist, I want to share a video of a story I told in April at The Moth. The theme was “Dazzled.”

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Quick Hits:

• Jam of the Week: Hinds – Boom Boom Back ft. Beck.

  (instant jam. cannot wait for Hinds new album out in September and their tour that hits Seattle in October.)

• Anthem of the Year: Macklemore – Hind’s Hall.
  (think what you will about Macklemore, but his protest song about Palestine is exactly correct. my heart. some of it is hard to watch and hard to hear, because genocide is sub-human and impossible to wrap your brain around. this video is a must-watch for all who are old enough.)

• HACKS IS BACK.

  (I love this show. as much as I thought it was resolved last season and there shouldn’t be another season, I AM SO GLAD IT’S BACK. I NEED YOU, DEBORAH.)

• Yes, I Watched The Met Ball Red Carpet Last Night.
  (love this flash photography. I thought the men SHOWED UP this year: Donald, Dan, Colman, Jeff. but my favorite looks of the night were [in this order]: Zendaya’s second look, Greta, and Gigi. also, I love this review. also, I saw this ad and LOVED it.)

• I Go Through Phases With Quotes.
  (these // two—found via Swiss Miss—are throwing me right back into a quote-a-day-in-my-journal phase.)

• I Made This Last Night.
  (adding the recipe to a weekly rotation. SO GOOD.)

• The Next Tarot Deck I Want.
  (*cough* mothersdayandmybirthdayarecomingup *cough* *cough*)

• I’ll Be At SIFF!
  (in a muuuuuch less glamorous outfit this year, but will definitely be at the Opening Night film. say hi! I also reviewed this beautiful film for The Stranger’s SIFF guide and highly recommend seeing it—ESPECIALLY on Mother’s Day.)

• OMG.

  (absolutely not appropriate to watch in ear-shot of anyone who employs you… children included.)

SO. MANY. THINGS. I love May. I love flowers. I love sunshine. I love water. I love bike rides. I love you.

xxo,
rachel.